Tuesday, November 29, 2005

--

oh my god.
this isnt happening.
it really isnt.
i'm seriously FUCKING irritated.
and NO ONE,
i mean NO ONE is helping me.
i need time to think.
what is happening!?
everything's going wrong.
at least i think so.
i dont know.
i'm confused.
someone put the barrier up for me again.
i cant stop myself from thinking and thinking and thinking.
oh man.
why do i get so easily irritated!?
i dont want to, you know.
but something just makes me so agitated.
i get pissed with everyone.
and i mean EVERYONE.
it's just that everyone doesnt know.
maybe it's a bad thing that i keep my anger inside aye?
but what can i do?
i cannot tell someone i'm angry and let the person think i'm just being unreasonable.
can i?
but it's just that too many things are happening and all that anger kept inside of me...
i need to let it all out.
but i think maybe i've got to change right?
as in..
not be so nice.
cos being the nice person i am to certain ppl,
just lets them trample all over me.
like i'm some rug or something.
but i'm not.
I HATE BEING TAKEN FOR GRANTED.
i used the word HATE.
and i mean it,
i AM going to runaway,
just not NOW.
ergh.
what am i talking about!?
okay.i just feel like typing and typing away on this keyboard until it spoils.
and you know what?
maybe not having a phone is a good thing.
i dont know.
but whatever it is,
the usual amerie isnt here anymore.
nah-ah.
i miss that old me.
just why,WHY did i have to change and become like this piece of waste and unwanted RUG?
seriously,
being nice,aint the best thing.
NOT AT ALL.
okay..maybe a bit.
BUT
what should i do!?!?!?!?!!?
somone help me.
dammit.

;amerie








| amerie fought for sanity @ 9:06 PM|

&i wonder if you ever loved me