Sunday, July 23, 2006

--

its the 23rd.
and boy oh boy,i ever knew it'd be this way.
i dont know if i can hold on to this.but i wna though.
im just very confused.
everything is coming as a whole.all the problems just rushing in.
my mind is whirling in.
i feel so tight.
my head's spinning.
i dont know what to think.

i was out at church today.
homed at arnd 5plus 6.
i didnt feel like gg home though.
i listened to my music and the songs tht played just played.
i dont know if its coincidence but..
first song was drive mself crazy then best in me then grow old with you then notice me.
its like so wth.
i wanted to cry.
but i just kept holding those tears back.
i told myself,what am i crying for?
there's nothing wrong.
everything's fine.
relax.
but nah..i dont know.

i reached home.
headed to my room.
sat down on the floor and just cried my heart out.
all the memories hitting me like a wave.
i just wish that everything would be like before.
where there were no problems AT ALL.
but of course.
i know that it's so impossible.
but well.
I DONT KNOW.
i really dont.

my mood's changing like fuck.
i'm so tired.
physically and mentally.
i'm about to shatter into tiny pieces.
my heart feels so cold.
RAHHHHHHHHHHHH!

)): )): )): )):

i'm fine.i'm fine.

heroes have their right to bleed too.

happy tenth month.love you baby girl.






| amerie fought for sanity @ 7:53 PM|

&i wonder if you ever loved me